Women are Gross...

Sorry ladies. I am about to blow some of our best kept secrets right of the water here on this one. You can hate me if you want to, but it's about time we come clean.



We are just as nasty as men. No, some of us may no fart in public, burp, swear, pick our noses or hack up lung oysters... But we're nasty in our own, very unique rights...


1. We smell everything on ourselves...

Everything. We do so in private or extremely craftily, but we sniff check everything. Happen to put our finger in our belly button while in bed, we sniff it. Spontaneous sex proposal? First chance we get, the hand is in our pants and we're snuffin' our residual business to make sure everything is A+. Some of us even go so far as to taste test. Yes.. We do. Don't deny it. You may or may not do everything on this list, but don't you dare deny the fact that you know as well as I do the majority of us ladies do it...


2. We fart into our vagina's. 


Pretty self explanatory. Maybe not right on up in there, but once more I will call you out if you even try to tell me you have not done the fart bubble shuffle. Hey.. It's hot air... And air bubbles plus fleshy folds equals the occasional trapped stink sphere...


3. We hate shaving.


This isn't so much a gross factor as it's just... a thing. We hate it.. And if we know we're not hopping on the bang wagon or are with someone we've grown comfortable with... Bring on the " Sloppy sloth"... Which would be slang for the tremendous bush we have decided to turn into a Wetlands Sanctuary.


Oh look! They cranes have begun their nesting!



4. The  Period check dab and swipe...

If you think you know what I'm talking about... Then you do it and no further explanation is needed.


5. We will discuss everything.

Everything. If we're comfortable, there is nothing off bounds to us. We will get into the nitty gritty about the birthing process, our periods, our sex life and our bowel movements. No really. And we do it mostly seriously. This isn't exactly " gross" but I have never once heard a man try to describe to his male friends the location of an in-grown hair on his testicle and how he managed to lance it.


6. When we do shave, we are not above secretly using our male counter part's razor


What... they work better. They just do...I mean. We're already doing master yoga poses in the shower as it is, might as well have a tool that's not going to puss out while we're at it.


Those are just five of the nasty things we do and I know there are more. Ladies, don't be shy! Leave me your nasty habits in the comments!!!